i dont know what 2 do!!!

stacy_elise · #1 06-07-2008, 11:28 AM

ive been with my boyfriend for 19 months and i love him so much hes 16 years older than me and has 5 kids from a previous relationship, i thought i could deal with this but lately it has become such a huge problem. his kids are now going bk home to the ex and repeating everything we say, sum times not great, i understand they're kids and thats wot kids do but..... jus stressed.
his ex is quite scruffyhouse always smells etc. well the kids stunk wen we had them the other day but coz we mentioned it my o/h dauhter exagerated it n told her mam now she wants 2 cum n beat me up. ha. so childish.
but its all put a huge strain on our relationship, i love him so much but dont know if i can cope with this, those who have read my other posts bout me bein depressed will understand.
wot do u think ladies.

melanie · #2 06-07-2008, 01:21 PM

oh no,isnt that just what kids do best,go off repeating whats been said! i guess you just have to be more carefull about what is said in front of them...and as for his ex!she should grow up a bit by the sounds of it! she prob only said she wants to beat u up just to scare you.i think you shouldnt worry about it too much and carry on as usual,just be a little more careful about what the little ones here.

stacy_elise · #3 06-08-2008, 04:03 PM

i know we have 2 be careful but his eldest daugter is a lot cleverer than ppl give her credit 4. but i do love him n suppose i have 2 jus deal with this 2 stay with him, so hard.

Newt · #4 06-13-2008, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stacy_elise

i know we have 2 be careful but his eldest daugter is a lot cleverer than ppl give her credit 4. but i do love him n suppose i have 2 jus deal with this 2 stay with him, so hard.

Very much a strain by the sounds of it and no easy solution but all you can do is try and not say too much when your kids are about...I know, I know its very very hard believe me...I have a child who is friends with the girl to the nosiest neighbour next door to us and she goes off telling all to the friend who in turn tells the mother who in turn then relays to us saying "oooooh did you?"....I know its a different senario but the relaying of tails are not......its a hard one and all you can do is try and not say to much as I said in front of the kids....we are still trying to master this act but it can be done...then at least they dont have anything to come back on

Lynne · #5 06-13-2008, 09:03 PM

I can imagine this is very hard. I guess the only thing you can do is be careful what you say. Have you tried talking to your partner about how you feel and how you think it is affecting your relationship?

emmal20 · #6 06-16-2008, 11:56 AM

hi i think its best u dont speak wiv her and ignore her for a while because shes jealus that u got him and she hasnt and ur home doesnt smell like hers. becare full wot u say next tym i hope ur depression is getting btr but she needs a kick in the arse to grow up

stacy_elise · #7 06-16-2008, 07:55 PM

thankyou ladies. i know i have to be carefu bout what i say round the kids but its soo bloomin hard wen they ave a mother like that. shes hard work, she believes shes physchic n can read ppl like a book n started bein clever with me, im quite shy n dont say much bk 2 ppl so she thought she cud b clever. totally made me out 2 b the type of person SHE can walk all over, well whoa did i prove her wrong. i fel 4 the kids i really do she drinks n smokes all week gos out 2 town twice a week then moans t my o/h shes skint n needs stuff 4 kids. me and my o/h go out our way 2 help 4 the kids but she jus expects him 2 cum running, ive had enough. but i love him soo soo much. x

happyhappylady · #8 06-17-2008, 08:57 AM

must be so hard. how about mediation to get you, her & him to talk things over? also have you considered going on anti-depressants? I did and they transformed my life

Lynne · #9 06-17-2008, 07:35 PM

Yes, I agree. Mediation could be an option, yet I'm sure she is not the most co-operative of ladies!!

stacy_elise · #10 06-17-2008, 08:06 PM

no definitely not an option unfortunately, she hates being wrong n cant admit 2 it when she is so u can imagine what it wud b like in mediation. its awkward coz we really used 2 get on even went for a drink together, all went wrong when her daughter started saying stuff bout me, even daughter admitted she lied but, jus not easy 2 sort anyway.
its ju hard 4 me coz im always stuck in middle ave 2 cope with it and put up wiv it coz i love my man. n im not going to lose him over this. x