sorry to start on a downer

nemo · #1 05-24-2008, 06:18 PM

hi im normally a bubbly happy person but i am pregnant with my first, im 11 weeks, and i am petrified of giving birth. i told my midwife the other day and she just laughed. i am seriously scared of it. im the kind of person who plans everything, makes lists of things to do all the time etc and so the thought of not being in control and not knowing what is going on terrifies me. i've been having nightmares since i found out i was pregnant and i keep crying about it. also the thought of possibly being torn makes my stomach churn. i was wondering is it possible to have an elective cesarean without a medical reason? and has anyone else felt like this? none of my family know yet so other than my partner i didnt know where to go with this.
sorry for the rant, i'll make my next post full of happy shiney things xx

stacy_elise · #2 05-24-2008, 06:24 PM

thats a hard 1 chuck, i suppose every1 is scared about goin into labour but it sounds like you really are petrified, as for your midwife laughing i dont think shes very gud, she should be encouraging you, and helpin u feel better. i was so scared bout labour its a control thing like you said, but it honestly isnt as bad as u may think, i know every1 is different, but as soon as u hold ure baby every thing that happens in labour almost dissapears,

happyhappylady · #3 05-24-2008, 07:43 PM

i was more scared with my 2nd. i tore with my first, but actually you don't feel it as that area is quite numb, i didn't need stitches and healed ok. I think you can elect for a c-section, but it is a major operation and carries more risks to you and your baby than a normal delivery. i have had 3 babies - if i was pregnant again i would go for hypnobirthing, cos everything i've read about it sounds great. Last time i had an epidural, which was the least painful labour I've had but you have to be quite dilated before you have it. just remember that your body was built to have babies, and you DO have the strength to cope with it. also try discussing your nightmares with someone in detail - i do that if i have nightmares, then once i've discussed it i don't get it again. You can do it!

happyhappylady · #4 06-06-2008, 10:09 PM

has it got any better?

Charlie_x · #5 06-08-2008, 09:00 AM

i think for alot of women like you said you like to plan things and be in control and in labour things might not always go the way you want it to go you've got ages yet hun just try and relax if anyone should be worrin its me ive only got 98 days left to go eeeekk!!

Newt · #6 06-13-2008, 08:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by x.Young.Mummy.2.be.x

i think for alot of women like you said you like to plan things and be in control and in labour things might not always go the way you want it to go you've got ages yet hun just try and relax if anyone should be worrin its me ive only got 98 days left to go eeeekk!!

I totally agree with what Charlie said...RELAX...think about things when they come...it might be scary but I have been through four births and all natural and only gas and air and it was ok hun...I was a bit apprehensive at first but when I was in labour your natural endorphins kick in and you just know what to do...take care

Lynne · #7 06-13-2008, 08:50 PM

I think when the time comes you don't have time to think about it and you just get on with it. I think things can be made worse if you think about it too much. The best thing to do is like others have said is to relax. I think as your pregnancy progresses and you become more familiar with what will happen etc you will feel more comfortable. At the moment you are probably scared of the unknown and what to expect.

You really need to have a chat with your midwife as she should be a great help. If she is no use and just laughs, see if you can change. You need to be encouraged and given good advice not laughed at!

Hope all goes well x

emmal20 · #8 06-16-2008, 12:01 PM

most off us got scared darl before wen we were pregs wiv our first i know the feeling