my friend is going through it, what do i say?

jennyspug · #1 08-13-2007, 07:01 PM

a good friend from the pnd clinic i was referred to has resently opened up to me that she is being battered by her other half. shes got 2 kids one 8 months and one 2 year old.
she terrified of being on her own but scared for her kids even though nothing has happened to them-yet.

i have never been through anything like this and really dont know what to say to her to help. i try and meet up as often as practical, (we live a 25 minute car journey apart) but when i see her all i can do is offer a friendly ear and hug. im lost as to what to do. i want to make the problem go away for her but dont know how. please someone help me be a better friend to her.

CoNFuSeD24 · #2 08-13-2007, 11:32 PM

I think the best thing you can do for her is be there for her and help her out best ya can. My dad used to hit my mum when I was younger but that was due to him drinking. he never hit my or my brother... only my mum.

Once he stoped drinking he went alright. My mum took my dad to court but he didnt show. Its always easy to say "Leave him you dont need him." But sometimes love is blinding. Like maybe she wants to leave him but she wont because she loves him so much or she loves him so much she belived he will change. I hope I may of helped you in some way. Sorry if I havent. Good luck. Let us know how she is going.

clare bear · #3 08-14-2007, 08:24 AM

its true chic all you can do is be a friend to her, let her know you have a shoulder to cry on if its needed. is there no organizations out there she can get in touch with for help and advice ie a womans refuge,does she have any close family that she speaks about ? i suppose it would be hard to confied in them thouhgh as they would get involved. chic i think all you can do is be there.

jennyspug · #4 08-15-2007, 09:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CoNFuSeD24

I think the best thing you can do for her is be there for her and help her out best ya can. My dad used to hit my mum when I was younger but that was due to him drinking. he never hit my or my brother... only my mum.

Once he stoped drinking he went alright. My mum took my dad to court but he didnt show. Its always easy to say "Leave him you dont need him." But sometimes love is blinding. Like maybe she wants to leave him but she wont because she loves him so much or she loves him so much she belived he will change. I hope I may of helped you in some way. Sorry if I havent. Good luck. Let us know how she is going.

thanks hun, it has helped a bit. i went to see her today as she text me to say shes really low. the good news is that she plucked up the courage to tell him hes got to leave, and he said yes, hes going in two weeks after hes been paid.
trouble is now shes scared of being alone with two kids, the younger is really sicky bless him. she really cheared up while i was there so ive told her we will meet up every week for a chat. hope it helps!!

CoNFuSeD24 · #5 08-17-2007, 02:24 PM

Thats alright hun... and that is good she told him to leave. She doesnt deserve to be treated like that... no one does. I bet she is scared of being on her own with 2 kids but its got to be better then one day her kids walking in on him hitting their mum.

jennyspug · #6 08-17-2007, 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CoNFuSeD24

Thats alright hun... and that is good she told him to leave. She doesnt deserve to be treated like that... no one does. I bet she is scared of being on her own with 2 kids but its got to be better then one day her kids walking in on him hitting their mum.

ya dead right girl xx