 Men Are Happier | |
>> > Your last name stays put.
>> > The garage is all yours.
>> > Wedding plans take care of themselves.
>> > Chocolate is just another snack.
>> > You can never be pregnant.
>> > You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
>> > You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
>> > Car mechanics tell you the truth.
>> > The world is your urinal.
>> > You never have to drive to another petrol station toilet because this one is just too icky.
>> > You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
>> > Same work, more pay.
>> > Wrinkles add character.
>> > Wedding dress £2000. Tux rental-£100.
>> > People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
>> > The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
>> > New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
>> > One mood all the time.
>> > Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
>> > You know stuff about tanks.
>> > A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.
>> > You can open all your own jars.
>> > You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
>> > If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
>> > Your underwear is £4.95 for a three-pack.
>> > Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
>> > You almost never have strap problems in public.
>> > You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
>> > Everything on your face stays its original colour.
>> > The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
>> > You only have to shave your face and neck.
>> > You can play with toys all your life.
>> > One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour for all seasons.
>> > You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
>> > You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
>> > You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
>> > You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
>> > No wonder men are happier.
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