The way I see it, having a baby can’t help but change pretty much every aspect of life as you know it. It certainly did for me and I’d say that one of the most influential factors in anyone’s life has to be the relationships we have with those around us.

As far as my marriage is concerned, our baby strengthened it. It showed me just how much my husband valued the relationship we had and in all honesty – he was my rock. He was so comforting, gave endless support and it really made the trust and love shine. Sad as it may be, I do understand that this isn’t always the case as babies and stress often come hand in hand. It’s said that more relationships break down in the first six months of a baby’s life than at any other time, but ever the optimist, I live in hopes of it all having a fairy tale ending.

Then we come to sex. I remember that our sex life was affected as (unfortunately) after managing to push out an 8 pound 4 ounce baby, my poor, poor nether region could have rivalled a wizard’s sleeve. But worry not! There is a cure! I cannot recommend pelvic floor exercises highly enough. The best way I can think of to describe how to do them is to imagine you are having a wee and squeeze as if you are stopping the flow. This exercise can be done anywhere – in the queue at Asda, watching the riveting antics on Big Brother, cooking a curry (I’m sure you catch my drift) etc. My lady pieces were back in the same condition as before I had my baby by the time she was about six months. It didn’t mean that my husband and I didn’t have a sex life; we still had fun, just in different ways (smirk smirk).

The relationship I had with my family changed quite dramatically. I have always been close (with the exception of my mother, but that’s a different story) to my family, but when I had my baby, it was like a switch flicked on. I finally understood why they were so protective over me when I was growing up and always wanted me to knuckle down and do well in school. Of course, when I was a know it all teen, I just saw it as them being “spoil sports� and cramping my non conformist “I love Manson, therefore I must dress as a Goth� (cringe) style. I can now honestly say that I appreciate everything that they were trying to do for me and I wouldn’t change my relationship with them for the world.

As for me, all I can say is how much of a reality check having a baby is. It really makes you realise how important the various relationships you have with those around you are and most certainly shows who your friends are. I would also say that I value myself more since childbirth. Maybe that’s because I felt so empowered during labour and birth, maybe its because I have proved to myself that I can be a good mother (not wanting to blow my own trumpet or anything), who knows?

How could I possibly finish up without mentioning the most important relationship of all – the Mother / Baby relationship. I find it so hard to describe. My baby is my everything and I would give my life for her. It makes me feel fuzzy inside when she offers me a hand full of chewed toast or smiles her amazing dribble clad smile, and needed when she falls over and looks to me to make it better. The bottom line is: I am immensely proud that my daughter is who she is.

As far as relationships go after a baby has been introduced into your life, there is no black and white. I can’t be so bold as to presume I know exactly how everyone will feel or react, just relay how it was (and is) for me. The best piece of advice I can offer is to go with your gut instinct and enjoy your life with your family.